look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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