just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize
