id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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