I hope mine doesn't look like that
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
