Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
