i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize