last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
it was like having sex with a tree stump
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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