Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
