3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
