So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
