I hope mine doesn't look like that
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
i now understand why vodka
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Randomize
