Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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