This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
