remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize