A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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