i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Randomize
