i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
