I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
