he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
