I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I am available for nakedness
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
