ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
