Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
