and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize