There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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