I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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