at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Randomize
