Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
My underwear smells like fireworks.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
