I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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