Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I am midnight drunk by noon
vagina is talking i cant
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
