I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
