Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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