u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
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