so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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