plz talk dirty to me
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
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