my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
The power of my boobs compel you
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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