why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Randomize
