so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
