He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize