Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
