Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
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