i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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