You really coming over, don't trick.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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