Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize