Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Randomize
