Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
