So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
well you can't waste a boner
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
he laminated a picture of his dick.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize
