Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
