I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
