yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Define "chronic" masturbator.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
We left the knife in your bed.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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