Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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