HIV tests are more positive than that guy
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
