Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
